Get help with anger

Important: Get urgent help

Support is available if you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or emergency, no matter what you're going through.

Find out where to get urgent help for mental health

Symptoms of anger

Anger can cause many different symptoms. It might affect how you feel physically or mentally, or how you behave.

Some people become aggressive towards others when they're angry. Other people hide their anger and may take it out on themselves.

It's not always easy to recognise when anger is the reason why you're behaving differently.

Physical symptoms

Physical symptoms of anger include:

faster heartbeat
tense muscles
clenching your fists
tightness in your chest
feeling hot

Mental symptoms

Mental symptoms of anger include:

feeling tense or nervous
being unable to relax
being easily irritated
feeling humiliated
resenting other people

Changes in behaviour

Changes in behaviour that can happen with anger include:

shouting
ignoring people or sulking
starting fights
breaking things
self-harming

Things you can try to help with anger

Do

try mindfulness techniques to help you recognise when you start to feel angry so you can take steps to calm down as early as possible
give yourself time to think before reacting – try counting to 10 and doing calming breathing exercises
talk to people about what's making you angry – speak to someone who is not connected to the situation, such as a friend or a GP
exercise – activities such as running, walking, swimming and yoga can help you relax and reduce stress
consider peer support, where people use their experiences to help others
try self-help cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) techniques to manage unhelpful thoughts, stressful situations and solve problems

Don’t

do not try to do everything at once – set small targets you can easily achieve
do not focus on things you cannot change – focus your time and energy on helping yourself feel better
try not to think you're alone in how you feel – most people feel angry sometimes, and support is available
try not to use alcohol, cigarettes, gambling or drugs to relieve anger – these can all contribute to poor mental health

Further information and support

When and where to get medical help

If you're struggling to cope with anger and the things you're doing to help yourself are not working, you may need medical help.

Non-urgent advice: See a GP if:

you're struggling to cope with anger
things you're doing to help yourself are not working
you're acting in an abusive or violent way
you're struggling to cope with stress, anxiety or depression
you've had a low mood for more than 2 weeks

Your GP may be able to refer you to a local anger-management programme or counselling.

Other ways to get help

If you have problems managing your anger, there are other ways to get help.

Anger management programmes

A typical anger management programme may involve 1-to-1 counselling and working in a group.

A programme may be a 1-day or weekend course, or over a couple of months.

The structure of the programme depends on who provides it, but most programmes include cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), as well as counselling.

There are also private courses and therapists who can help with anger issues. Make sure any therapist you see is registered with a professional organisation, such as the British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy.

Referring yourself for therapy

If you need more support, you can get free talking therapies, such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), on the NHS.

You can refer yourself directly to a talking therapies service without a referral from a GP.

Find an NHS talking therapies service

If you're aged 17 or under, or want to get help for someone under 18, find out how to get mental health support for children and young people.

Causes of anger

There are many different causes of anger and it's different for everyone.

Some common things that make people feel angry include:

being treated unfairly and feeling powerless to do anything about it
feeling threatened or attacked
other people not respecting you, your feelings or your property
being interrupted when you're trying to achieve a goal

How you react to anger can depend on lots of things, including:

the situation you're in at the moment – if you're dealing with lots of problems or stress, you may find it harder to control your anger
your family history – you may have learned unhelpful ways of dealing with anger from the adults around you when you were a child
events in your past – people who experience traumatic, frightening or stressful events sometimes develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), which can lead to angry outbursts
substances such as drugs and alcohol – which make some people act more aggressively than usual

Some of the things that make you angry may not bother other people at all.

You might find it hard to explain why you feel this way but talking to someone could help you find a solution.

Find out about the 5 steps to mental wellbeing

Important

If uncontrolled anger leads to domestic violence and abuse (violence or threatening behaviour within a relationship), there are places that offer help and support.

You can contact organisations such as:

Find out more about getting help for domestic violence and abuse.