Video: what can we do if we argue and fight?
This video explores ways to deal with arguments with your partner after your baby is born.
Media review due: 5 April 2023
Pregnancy brings big changes to your life, especially if this is your first baby. Some people find it easier to cope with these changes than others do. Everybody is different.
Even if you feel excited about having your baby, it's also common to feel vulnerable and anxious while pregnant.
If feeling down or anxious is affecting your everyday life, tell a midwife. You will be offered help to deal with worrying thoughts or feelings.
Find out more about mental health in pregnancy.
You may find that you are having arguments with your partner while you’re pregnant.
Some arguments may have nothing to do with the pregnancy, but others may be caused by feeling worried about the future and how you're going to cope.
It's important to talk with your partner about how you’re feeling. If you are worried about your relationship, talk to a friend, family member or your midwife.
If your relationship is abusive or violent, get help. There are organisations that can help such as:
- Women's Aid, which works to keep women and children safe
- galop: The LGBT+ anti-violence charity
Find out more about domestic abuse in pregnancy.
Support in labour
If you have a partner, they may want to be present at the baby's birth. It can help to find out about your birth options, including where you can give birth.
You can also find out about what your birth partner can do to support you, and what it can mean for them to share this experience.
If you do not have a partner, you may have family or a friend you could ask to be your birth partner.
Involve your birth partner in antenatal classes if you can, and let them know what you want. It may help to discuss your birth plan with them so they understand your wishes for labour.
Having a baby if you're on your own
If you’re on your own, ask your midwife if there are antenatal classes in your area that are especially for single people.
After birth, it can be encouraging to meet other single parents who also went through pregnancy on their own.
Gingerbread is a self-help organisation for single-parent families. It has a network of local groups and can give you information and advice. The charity can also put you in touch with other parents in a similar situation to you.
Visit the Gingerbread online forum (registration required).
Money and housing
If money is an immediate concern, find out more about the maternity and paternity benefits and leave you're entitled to claim. Your local Jobcentre Plus or Citizens Advice service can advise you.
If you have a housing problem, contact your local Citizens Advice or your local housing advice centre.
You might be eligible for a Sure Start Maternity Grant on GOV.UK, or Healthy Start vouchers for free milk, vegetables and vitamins.