Is your child depressed?

Many people think that depression affects only adults. In fact, children and teenagers can be affected, too.

Watch a video about teens who self-harm and how they can be helped.

According to figures from the Office of National Statistics, one child in 10 in Great Britain aged between five and sixteen has a recognisable mental disorder, with 4% of children suffering from an emotional disorder such as anxiety or depression.

The problem for parents is that depression in children can be difficult to spot.

Depression warning signs

There are ways to tell the difference between normal ups and downs and the beginnings of a more serious emotional health problem.

Dr Navina Evans is consultant psychiatrist at London's Capio Nightingale Hospital and the East London and City Mental Health Trust.

"The obvious signs to look out for include a low mood and unhappiness, with tearfulness or irritability that may not be related to anything specific," she says.

"Also watch out for reactions when something sad happens. For instance, when someone dies it's normal for everyone in the family to feel distressed. But if you feel your child's reaction is too extreme or has gone on for too long, that could also be a sign of depression."

According to Dr David Kingsley, consultant adolescent psychiatrist at Cheadle Royal Hospital's Young Persons' Service, if your child's mood is affecting their day-to-day functioning, this is a sign that a mental health problem should be investigated.

"If a young person is unable to function at school and has lost interest in things they were previously interested in, then that's a major sign," he says. "So, too, is increasing social isolation. These are signs that low mood is causing significant impairment."

Dealing with depression in children

If you feel your child is suffering from depression, what should you do?

"The first thing you should do is talk to them," says Dr Evans. "Try to find out what's troubling them. And whatever's causing the problem, don't trivialise it. It may not be a big deal to you, but it could be a major problem for your child."

If you're still worried after talking to them, see your GP, says Dr Kingsley.

"If it's something that requires further treatment, there are several options, including counselling services for young people, family therapy or cognitive behavioural therapy, which is a type of talking therapy. A specialist may also consider antidepressant medication, but only in severe cases."

For more information on the different types of talking therapies, read our Guide to talking therapies.

In the meantime, if you worry that your child may be prone to depression, what can you do to stop it happening?

Dr Kingsley says: "All children and young people need to feel respected, valued and loved. They need to have relationships with caregivers (usually parents) where they feel valued for who they are in an unconditional and positive way.

"Such a relationship would go a long way to protect a young person against developing depression."

Self-harm

An expert explains why young people may self-harm, and describes some of the different forms it can take. Caroline, director of Harmless, used to self-harm as a teenager. She gives advice on how to get the right support.

Last reviewed: 15/09/2010

Next review due: 15/09/2012

Comments are personal views. Any information they give has not been checked and may not be accurate.

legokid502 said on 15 April 2011

Its hard for teens with depression there are alot of misconceptions about what people acctually feel like. People think its oh they feel sorry for themselves but its not it makes you feel worse than that. Im 16 now but my doctor thinks i have had depression since i was 8 years old i have also asked my school numerous times to help and they are only starting to help me a few weeks before i leave. I think more people need to know and need to be aware!

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User492632 said on 27 January 2011

Children in secondry school are put under a lot of pressure . My daughter is 12 and she gets loads of homework . As a parent I try to make sure she still gets to have lots of fun in her life . They should not always be worrying about school and exams. Being depressed however is a natural feeling. I dont think it should be called a mental illness and I disagree with giving antidepressants to children. Their brains are growing and developing and these drugs could cause damage.

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z_star_xx said on 10 July 2010

i agree and i think that teenagers like me (15) should get help with depression and anger but sometimes parents put it off becaus ethey cannt be bothered so i think teens should get much more support along with children

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cuddzy mummmy d said on 17 May 2010

my child is nearly 8 she has had to cope with moving 3 times and her real mum has been dead since she was four andtalks about her mums old boyfriend she wont talk to me or her dad i need help with this issue please help me to get some info for for her

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amit1994 said on 19 February 2010

Im 15 turning 16 soon, ive got my gcses this year, and i feel like im not going to get good enough grades i feel as if i dont kno enough and im always stressing about it - alot! then i have home problems, i feel negelcted in the family and i hardly get to go out! i always feel down and negative but i rarely have good times..
Sometimes i feel like giving into drugs and hope that will help me, but i then realise its no worth it, but i do feel like doing it sometimes.

Thank

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shannon1234 said on 24 December 2009

hello, im shannon im 14 years old . i I lost my close friend about 1 and half months ago , my mum is worried about me and im feeling really bad since he passed away i've been sleeping all the time and not going to school crying every night , being angry with my other friends..
im not sure what i should do.?
thanks

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dodoran said on 08 July 2009

hey, you should take your child to the GP. Describe the problems and your concerns and they usually refer you to a psychological assessment. After that they decide what would be the best thing to do for your child, usually councilling but other therapies as well that can help.

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tiggeriswild6 said on 03 June 2009

well. im 15 ..
and have severe depression, and my parents talkin to me didnt help,,
i just need to feel loved,, but as soon as i get yelled at or something, i feel really unhappy and kinda unloved/unwanted,,

i beleive mii depression started with a broken heart, but i stil love him,, he says he loves me too,, loved him since the start 21/09/2006.

but when he mucks around and calls me names it hurts, even though i know he doesnt mean them,, he's just being silly, we are the same age..

his mum moved house and took him with her, at the end of 2007 ,, and when they moved i lost apart of me,, i still saw him every weekend, friday nyt and saturday,, but it was nothing compared to how much i want to see him..

so , a tip from me, is don't let yhoor children get emotionally atatched, coz when the person they love becomes their everything,, when they go , yhoor left with nothing..
he dumped me and went out with mii best friend,, and she lied to me and said she wasnt going out with him,, so now she isnt my best friend,, we were split for a year,, no contact , coz he moved school too... half an hour away, but his mum would never let me see him,, she thinks im bad for him, and so said b4 we split for a year that if we ever spoke to eachother she would stop him coming thru to see his dad, and if i tried to contact him , she would get the police on me, she obviously doesnt know how much i love him,
i didnt want to be the cause of him not seeing his dad, so i lost contact,, but then he sent me an email , we emailed for a lil while, then swaped numbers, so many tears i swept away talking about the memories.

i'll stop yapping on about that, but see how attached i am tohim, i maybe young , but i feel love just as much as adults, so please stop your kids falling in love, which is weird to say but true,, but coz of it i cry so much , when we fall out , i think everythings over and mii life isnt worth living.

p.s we are back together afta that year .
Amy x

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sarahcam1983 said on 06 May 2009

My child is 7 years old and has a lot of psychological problems relating back to myself and his father separating.
I feel councilling would help but cant afford to go private. Can anyone give me help on where to go.

Thanks

Sarah

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