At the time when we were in hospital,
a couple of doctors had told me
that it was very unlikely that
would make it through this and survive.
At that point you make promises
and you beg and you ask,
just one more chance.
I was gardening and I remember
getting an intense pain in my head
and I was holding my skull,
almost holding it back onto my head,
it was so painful.
And I collapsed on the floor.
(Andrew) Heather had
a subarachnoid haemorrhage,
and it was a bleed on the right
posterior communicating artery.
She had a 12-millimetre tear
in the artery there.
She had damage
to the frontal lobe part of her brain,
which is where,
as one of our counsellors put it,
it's where you have the
good idea/bad idea part of your brain
and it's where it weighs it up.
In Heather's brain
that had been damaged,
and especially in the early days
it just wasn't there,
so any impulses that came through,
there were no brakes on that impulse,
so if Heather had an urge
she would follow it through.
Before the brain injury
I'd been living with Andy for 15 years
and I had never, ever strayed, never.
I just wouldn't ever
have gone with anyone else
because Andy was everything to me,
and then after the brain injury
there were men everywhere that I fancied
and it was really strange
because it wasn't how I used to be.
So it was different
and it was quite shocking.
The other thing I found
when I came across some of these men
is that they weren't attractive
as to how I knew Heather.
One guy was in his 70s.
There was a guy
that Heather knew from school
and he must have weighed
about 17 stone of pure lard.
It didn't seem to matter
what the person looked like.
It did feel like I had to do it.
It was almost like once I was on a
I couldn't stop.
Every normal sexual urge that we
a day-to-day basis, or thought, was...
- It was amplified and it had no brakes.
Heather would see a guy
and maybe proposition him.
It can be horrible.
It's been nearly four years
since Heather had her haemorrhage
and Heather still will speak to people
and is likely to indulge in
behaviour, given the opportunity.
It's almost like I'm 12 years old
because I've got 24-hour supervision.
I do find it very frustrating, don't I?
I'm always moaning to you,
"Why can't I stay here on my own?"
"No, you can't, Heather."
If there was nobody here, the
system, what do you think you'd do?
I don't know.
Just be honest. If you didn't have
the braking system from the outside...
I don't know. I'd probably have
lots of fun, wouldn't I?
- What would that fun involve?
- I don't know, darling.
Are you finding it difficult
to say it now?
See, for me that's another sign that
Heather's managing to make a recovery,
because at one point she would have
spoken exactly what she was feeling,
there would have been no braking system,
but as you can see
there's a bit of a braking system.
"I'm not saying that on the camera."
Now it's coming to a point
whereby Heather is learning
to sort of control her impulses.
(Heather) I felt like
I was just the same as I always was
and I've got people examining me
and saying I'm not, I'm not.
It was hard to accept that,
wasn't it, for me?
It's still difficult
for you to accept it now.
You have to be non-judgmental,
you can't put across your own views
and hold your own standards
on this person.
I got the same feelings and emotions
that anybody in a long-term
when their partner's strayed off
or had sexual relations with somebody,
but I've been lucky that
I've always been able to fall back on
this is not Heather acting out,
this is her brain injury acting out.
This is not Heather,
this is her brain injury.
It takes time and it takes patience.
For us it's been worth struggling
through anything that we've come across.
It's been worth it.