Building self-esteem in children
starts from the day that they're born.
In fact, the first six months of
have been shown to be very important
in terms of
setting up the
neurobiological chemistry of the brain.
The parent acts
as a mirror to the child at this age
information the child is getting
about themselves as a very young infant
directly from their parent
or caregiver's face.
Self-esteem is important
because it gives us an opportunity
to show our
to show what we're good at in life
expect from other people
a certain reaction.
If we have negative self-esteem
to always see us as failing
and as not being very good at things.
If we have a positive sense
we like the way that we are
and the way
that we interact
with the world.
Probably the most important thing
you can do
self-esteem in your children
is to praise them at every opportunity.
As a rough guide,
you need to
be saying at least
six positives for each negative comment
for your child to develop
a healthy sense of themselves.
Another very important thing is to
remember lots of demonstrative love
for your child.
This is even on occasions
when they're not achieving
Ridiculing and shaming your child
is a very dangerous thing to do.
We obviously need to get a balance.
We need to allow children to
when they're doing something wrong
are going to be occasions
when you need to criticise a behaviour,
different about shaming your child.
Other important things
to remember to do as a parent
talk, to listen, to play
and to laugh with your child.
Children need to spend time
telling you about their day,
about the things
that have gone right
and the things that have gone wrong
need to be open and have time
to listen to those kind of comments.
I think there is a fine line between
making your child very arrogant
have high self-esteem.
And there are cultural differences
the way that different groups of people
approach praising their child.
I think a child needs
to have an opportunity
to find out what they're good at
parent's job, and a school's job
is to celebrate those achievements.
At the same time, a child isn't going
to be good at everything
and I think
if you bombard children
with the message
that they need to be good at everything,
are quite all-rounders,
that can lead to arrogance.
So I think there is a fine line to play
but I don't
parents should shy away
It's vitally important to self-esteem.
Children with high self-esteem
tend to demonstrate
can handle strong emotions
than children with low self-esteem.
This also stands them in good stead
to develop good, positive relationships
both with family and friends
good relationships in adult life.
Children who have a low self-esteem
for any kind of failures in life
and have a
to get quite angry about things.
They will struggle with
dealing with strong emotions
and tend to
from new experiences.
They will also struggle to make
relationships with other children
that will present a challenge,
and might get involved in bullying.
Schools should work to encourage
children in a positive way
and lots of
use very positive ways
children's different achievements.
important that you find
a school for your child
that they do that
your child's getting
a different message from a nursery
or a different caregiver or a teacher,
will be shamed
if they make a mistake,
and their successes aren't recognised,
can also have an effect
on the child's long-term self-esteem.
If, for quite a long period of time,
your child's been showing signs
that might indicate low self-esteem,
port of call is to go to
the GP to discuss your concerns,
and the GP
will be able to refer you,
if they feel that that's necessary,
local Child and Adolescent
Mental Health Service.
Here your child will have an opportunity
about what's going on
and how they're feeling.
Building a healthy sense of
in your child,
it's never too late to start doing that.
Children at any age or stage
benefit from lots of praise,
lots of attention,
that you appreciate what they do
and what they bring to life.
So it's really important
that throughout childhood
and indeed adulthood,
and provide unconditional love.