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Mary Fisher said on 20 February 2012

We're in our mid seventies and my husband has had a radical prostatectomy. We've made love, passionately and very frequently, since we met when we were nineteen. We had five children in seven years, then we paid for a vasectomy (in those days it was 25 gns) but it was worth it. Lovemaking has changed over the decades but has hardly lessened, in fact occasionally we make love within hours of the last time. Has it improved? I can't say - i can't remember how we were in our twenties, thirties or forties. I know that making love is wonderful, always new and fresh, a surprise. My reactions are certainly different now that he has learned more about how to stimulate me, I had to get used to his 'dry orgasms' but in a way that's good - less inconvenient. The injections, Cialis and vacuum pump we were prescribed aren't used any more, they're not necessary. He's the best lover I've ever had. And I certainly don't want any other. If he dies before me I'll be very unhappy on many levels, not least because I'll miss his beautiful (to me) body. What I don't like is referring to love making as 'sex'. Sex is something casual, it happens between people who hardly know each other, even strangers. One night stands seem to be expected from first dates. My husband and I don't have sex, we make love, in many ways. I care for him, he cares for me, that's also love. It's not sex.